Friendships

Friendship is a gift from God. Good friends are rare and one must nurture friendships very carefully.

Growing Healthy Friendships

Everyone understands that growing a healthy garden doesn’t happen without proper soil, sunlight, fertilizing and weeding. The same principles apply to friendships. In order to thrive, they require care and maintenance.

Find fertile soil. A friend should be someone you choose to have in your life because he or she enriches your experience. Rethink your friendships. Are you expending your energy in all the wrong places?

Add sunlight. Make your friend a priority in your life. Even with hectic schedules you can get together to exercise or meet for a quick cup of coffee. Keep in touch by phone and e-mail.
It takes time and energy.

John 15:13 - Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.

Plant seeds. Establish a strong foundation by indicating in word and deed that you will be there for your friend, through thick and thin. Most important, make it safe for your friend to share innermost thoughts with you by always keeping confidences.

Proverbs 17:17A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

Fertilize. Don’t take the individual or your friendship for granted. Friendship is something you must earn each day.

Water. Always be generous with praise and cautious with criticism. Applaud successes, and do your best to be a good listener.
Hebrews 10:24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.

Weed. When you have a disagreement, try to see things from your friend’s point of view. Choose your words carefully, as it is hard to take back things said in anger. If you are wrong, swallow your pride and apologize.

When we plant a tree, we take care of that plant from the smallest stage of growth. We not only nurture that plant with water, air and fertilizers, but also protect it from any damage. Friendship is one such plant. One has to take care of friends, as one takes care of the plants, one grows.Most of us take friendship for granted. We believe that friends are always there, whenever we need them.
Make a quick list of all your good friends.
How many of them have been friends for more than 5 years? If you don’t have many long term friends you need to question how you value your friends.
Now write the date, when you last communicated with them in anyway.
When did you last meet them?
When did last share meal with them?
When did you send them a gift?

This exercise will give you clues about anything that needs to be done by you to nurture friendship. Value your friendship by nurturing it on a regular basis. Meeting friends regularly, finding about what may be bothering them, sending them small gifts over intervals, sharing jokes with them, asking them for a movie together, and so many other things can help us make our friendship bond stronger.

Why You Need to Be Aware of Who You're Associating With
Friends should be there to support you and to enrich your life. If they’re bringing you down, it’s time to move on. The people you choose to surround yourself with should also be great spirits who inspire you to be the absolute best you can be.

Be aware of who you are associating with. If you're around negative people all the time very likely you will find that you start to think this way too. If you're with positive, excited to be alive people, that will rub off on you. It's an easy way to build confidence just by being aware of what kind of people you surround yourself with. Unhealthy friendships take a lot of energy and really just aren't worth it.


Proverbs 12:26A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Do you have unhealthy friendships? Not Sure? Ask yourself this question right after you have spent some time with someone:
"Do I feel better or worse than I did before?"


How many times have you spent time with someone only to feel completely drained afterwards? Or you find that they’re constantly putting you down even if it’s very subtle how they do it?

Do you have an unhealthy friendship. Ask yourself does he or she...
consistently hurt your feelings?
chip away at your self-esteem?
spoil happy times with a bad attitude?
make you feel physically or emotionally ill?
waste your time by not showing up or calling when they said they would?
consume your time and energy by sucking you into their dramas and bad habits?
demand too much of your time and or try to limit your contact with others?
offer friendship only at their convenience and express little interest in what's going on in your life?
get in the way of your personal, emotional and spiritual growth?

If your friendships are unhealthy you need to consider ending the friendship. Be honest with your friend (but compassionate) about your reasons. It could be the best thing you could do for them.